Misunderstandings Make The World Go Round
by Aerika-san
Summary: They had a stressful job, and it was a way to let off steam. Meaningless intimacy in the middle of a war. They weren’t lovers, they weren’t friends. Hell, they hated each other. It didn’t mean anything to either of them. Did it? AreKan/Yullen
1. How did it come to this?

Just a mini fic I was beaten by my subconscious into writing while coming down from my high after finishing Changing Lives, and before I start on my next BIG project "Paper Hearts". This is all planned and out and half written and will probably be posted in its entirety by the end of next week.

And so, the usual junk: M rated for male on male explicit sexual situations and foul language. Yullen and AreKan and No, I don't own DGM. K?

Summary: They had a stressful job, and it was a way to let off steam. Meaningless intimacy in the middle of a war. They weren't lovers, they weren't friends. Hell, they hated each other. It didn't mean anything to either of them. Did it?

**Misunderstandings make the world go round**

**One: How did it come to this?**

He wasn't sure how it had happened. He hated the little sprout, and the Moyashi certainly made it no secret that Kanda was the one person in the whole Order that he couldn't stand, so how had it come to _this?_

When the insults had started flying, he'd naturally thought fists would follow- he'd never expected clothing to be shed, especially not in the frenzied way they had been. Not that a few punches hadn't been thrown into the mix as well. Damn that kid hit hard. Slept hard too, little idiot.

He looked at the boy sleeping next to him, though he couldn't really call him a boy, not really. Seventeen years old and a critical to boot, there was no longer anything boyish about Allen Walker. Not during the day and certainly not at night if what had just occurred was anything to go by. Only now… he was fast asleep as though he hadn't got a care- his forehead free of the thoughtful frown he wore when he thought no one else was looking, and the fake cheerful smile he wore when they were was absent too and he looked calm… at peace.

But even sleep couldn't wipe away the deep smudges of fatigue from under his eyes. Kanda wondered how many sleepless nights and tiring missions it took to permanently scribe exhaustion onto your features. That was why, despite the fact that they were both squeezed uncomfortably onto Kanda's bed, he couldn't quite find it in himself to wake the bean sprout up and kick him out.

Even though if anyone found out he had Allen Walker naked in his bed covered in the release from their encounter… well… Kanda always carried Mugen with him for a reason.

He looked at the mission documents on the floor at the bedside, the whole reason for their tryst in the first place and decided that since he obviously wasn't getting any sleep tonight he'd better read the missive and familiarise himself with the details of his next mission.

It was going to be awkward enough when Allen woke without admitting he knew nothing about the mission that they were leaving for in a matter of hours as well…

0o0o0o0o0

_Two hours earlier… _

Allen muttered angrily under his breath as he stomped down the corridor wielding a mission folder that Komui made him go and deliver to his partner for the next month. It wasn't like he wasn't going to be seeing enough of Kanda to last him a lifetime on this mission anyway.

It was getting late- Kanda was going to be pretty pissed off at being disturbed at this time of night_. Asshole_, Allen added mentally and felt at little better for the insult, even if it was only internal. He took a breath and hammered on Kanda's door, a little too loudly, until the man yanked it open, a foul expression on his face. "Here you go, asshole." Wow, saying it out loud to his face was even better. "Mission briefing" and he shoved the folder at the other man, intending to get away and go to bed as soon as possible.

Kanda took the folder, flipping to the front page while Allen hung about, waiting for some sort of thank you.

"A mission. With you."

Allen blinked. Damn he was tired. "That's what it says baKanda."

"What the hell are they doing pairing me with you Moyashi?"

"It's Allen" he grated out from between clenched teeth. "And it's not like I'm happy about it either."

Kanda sneered. "Why not Moyashi? It's not like you'll be doing any work."

"Allen, my name is Allen, you dick! And what the hell is _that_ supposed to mean?" the white haired exorcist's voice grew louder as he spoke.

"Tch, shut up _Moyashi_, you're giving me a headache."

Allen threw his arms into the air with a frustrated noise. "Whatever. God, you're such a prick!" he rubbed his eyes tiredly. "Just read the damn folder and be ready to leave at ten tomorrow morning."

"Are you sure _you'll_ be up in time tomorrow?" Kanda smirked. "You look dead on your feet- surely you're not so weak that such a simple mission as your last one wore you out?"

Allen spun so quickly that Kanda didn't even register the motion until after his jaw was throbbing.

"Shut the hell up Kanda, I'm not dealing with your shit right now."

"You just fucking hit me" Kanda said in something like disbelief. Not shock, never shock- he was Kanda after all. "You _fucking little shit_, you just _fucking_ hit me!"

"What's the matter? Too fast for you?" Allen smirked. It was his turn to reel back as Kanda's fist met his face, over his right eye.

It descended quickly into a mad brawl, but Allen was tired, drained from his last mission, and soon found himself pressed against a wall inside Kanda's room, arms pinned above his head and Kanda glaring down at him, both panting heavily.

"You little shit" Kanda said again, pressing Allen into the wall with his body and pulling his head back by his hair. "How dare you fucking hit me!" he growled, pressing closer and looming threateningly over the smaller exorcist.

A noise that wasn't quite one of pain escaped Allen's throat as the dark haired man hung over him, and it made Kanda paused, realising how compromising their position was, his lower body cradled against the shorter man's. And Allen's body didn't seem to be complaining.

Kanda frowned when he realised that this didn't disgust him at all. Quite the opposite in fact. Interesting.

He met the challenging silver eyes and smirked. "Having problems Moyashi?"

Allen's face burned red. "Shut the hell up you asshole!" and he tried to twist away, his struggle becoming more pronounced when the grip on his wrists and hair didn't slacken.

And then Kanda was kissing him and he was no longer fighting to get away but trying to free his hands to feel that hair that hung loose down Kanda's back. Something in his posture must have told Kanda that his victim was far from unwilling and he released Allen's hands in favour of undoing the smaller man's clothing while those mismatched hands flew into midnight hair, using it as a handle to direct Kanda's mouth.

Neither man could pinpoint when they became naked but neither minded as they fell upon the bed in a tangle of limbs.

By chance Kanda ended up on top. He'd not done this before, but common sense and a vague recollection of something Lenalee called 'doujins' told him that a dry run would hurt, and he didn't hate the sprout that much. Plus it would interfere with their mission. He found he wanted this, and thought that slowing down to hunt for some form of lubrication would kill the mood and make it awkward to continue, much less look each other in the eyes tomorrow. And he didn't want to seem like he _cared_.

God he _needed _this, it was intoxicating- a feeling he'd never had before- the feeling of just letting _go. _He sucked hard on Allen's neck, leaving a dark reddening bruise before spitting on his fingers and shoving one roughly into the man beneath them, revelling in the half-pained surprised cry the action drew, and it spurred him to add a second finger, slowing down just enough to widen the passage for a third.

There were tears running down Allen's face and they were intoxicating too, especially when he curled his fingers just _so _and those metallic eyes flew open and a strangled shout that was not of pain escaped him.

"Again" Allen urged, bucking onto the fingers buried within him.

God it hurt so much, but the pain was wonderful and cleansing and he'd not felt so free in such a long time it was worth going through this just to feel it.

Kanda complied willingly, wanting to see that expression again before pulling his fingers free and lining himself up, slinging Allen's legs over his shoulders and pushing the younger man's thighs back against his body as he sank in.

The grimace on Allen's face spoke of pain, but he as didn't tell Kanda to stop he pressed in fully, pausing for a moment until that expression had faded before starting to move.

Every noise and expression was perfection personified as he thrust again and again, motions frenzied and rough and just _so wonderful_ he knew he'd do anything to feel it again.

Allen's length was hard between them, and he ran his hand along it curiously. Communal baths left little to the imagination, but he'd never _touched_ and he found himself cataloguing each ridge of flesh. The slow teasing strokes were completely at odds with the thrusting of his body and Allen cried out as his thumb explored the head, running a calloused digit over the slit and squeezing.

Kanda grunted as it suddenly became harder to move as Allen's inner walls clenched around him with his release and the additional friction felt _so good _that he sped up, his motions feeling slicker now, smoother and it was so wonderful that he gave himself over to the climax, soaking up the sensation before pulling away.

He was a little concerned at the blood that mixed with the semen running down Allen's leg and glanced up at the other man.

It appeared that Allen had fallen asleep, maybe even passed out, and he remembered how tired the younger exorcist had been when he had first come to Kanda's room. He considered getting something to clean up with, but the thought of additional movement made his body ache, so he pulled the covers from the floor where they'd been kicked at some point and lay down beside the other man, covering them both. Though for him, sleep proved elusive.


	2. The morning after the night before

**Two: The morning after the night before**

Allen stirred slowly, feeling wakefulness return to him gradually. His body didn't seem to want to obey his commands, but he wasn't too concerned about that yet. In fact, he was supremely unconcerned about a lot of things, which was unusual for him- usually worries of all sorts were running though his mind from the moment he woke, and sometimes long before, but right now he felt blissfully relaxed.

He opened his eyes carefully, glancing at the window to try and judge the time and thought it was probably about five in the morning, the sun still below the horizon and muted pre-dawn light filtered through the gap in the curtains.

He felt the warmth at his back and was surprised that Kanda wasn't already up and training.

"Finally awake Moyashi?"

"Mmm-hmm" he tried to stretch but his back warned him not to push his muscles too far just yet. "What time is it? How long have you been awake?"

"It's a quarter to five, and I haven't been to sleep yet" Kanda replied, slightly hesitantly. He was waiting for Allen to start shouting and screaming at him for what happened the night before.

Allen eased into a sitting position, wincing as the ache in his lower back increased. "How come?" he asked, pushing the hair from his eyes before yawning widely. He'd not slept so well for a long time.

"I was reading."

Kanda seemed in a downright friendly mood this morning, so Allen was getting the hell out while the going was good. "Well, I guess I'll see you at the docks" he said as he swung his legs from the bed and began gathering his clothes, grimacing at the dried bodily fluids coating his skin.

Kanda frowned. Wasn't he going to start yelling soon? Allen noticed the other man's expression and raised an eyebrow as he pulled on his shirt. "Something wrong?"

"Doesn't this bother you" Kanda asked, gesturing at himself, the bed, the general mess their encounter had made of the room.

Allen's second eyebrow rose in surprise. "No. Should it? It's just sex, it's not like it means anything. We don't even like each other, remember? It was just a way to let off steam." He grinned crookedly. "And it worked, I feel better than I have in weeks. Though you could stand to be a little less rough, you know" he added, grin still in place as he rubbed his tender back. He gave the man in bed a last half wave of farewell and opened the door. "See you later." And then he was gone.

A way to let off steam? Kanda thought about it. He _did_ feel better this morning than he had for a while and the Moyashi was right- it didn't _mean_ anything, they weren't even friends. It was just a way to release their tensions- meaningless sex. It might never happen again. Though he suspected the opportunity would come again soon. They did have very stressful jobs after all.

0o0o0o0o0

The train rattled noisily, but it wasn't enough to keep him awake, and he spent much of the journey dozing with his head against the window and Mugen in his arms.

Allen sat opposite him, playing with Timcampy, pulling the golden golem's wings until the little creature got fed up and made to bite him with its miniature fangs and was hurriedly released.

After a while Allen spoke, though his gaze remained fixed on the scenery flashing passed the window. "Something on your mind, Kanda?"

Kanda gave up on trying to sleep and opened his eyes. Normally he would have rudely dismissed the question but his thoughts were in turmoil. "What does this mean?"

"Huh? What are you talking about? What does what mean?"

"This, us, whatever the hell happened last night!" Kanda snapped. Allen crossed his arms and looked away from the window to the older man's face. "Us? There is no us. I said that this morning, and you agreed, it was just meaningless sex- there's nothing more to it." He shrugged. "Just because we're exorcists doesn't mean we shouldn't have some fun along the way."

Kanda frowned. Allen just sounded so casual about it all- the very subject was making Kanda feel awkward. Allen sat forward, clasping his hands together. "Look, "he said, looking uncharacteristically serious. "If you're uncomfortable with it, we can forget it ever happened, if that's what you want."

Kanda knew he'd never be able to forget last night, even if he _did_ want to, but hex couldn't tell Allen that. "What do you want?"

Allen rolled his eyes and shrugged again. "What, you want an ego boost? It was good sex, Kanda, and I wouldn't mind repeating the experience, only with a little more warning and a _lot_ more lube, yeah?" He smirked. "Komui would be happier if you found some other way of dealing with your issues; he's fed up of replacing the furniture you keep slicing up."

"Tch." And there it was, the normal, no-nonsense, call-me-by-my-first-name-and-I'll cut-your-head-off Kanda that Allen was used to dealing with. "So what are you suggesting? We casually fuck each other to reduce stress?"

"Well perhaps not in those words, but kind of, sure. And I mean, even you get a little horny sometimes, right? Cos there's no way you can claim to be asexual after what you did last night." He fingered the bruise around his right eye. "Though the violence could do with toning down a bit."

Kanda's mouth twisted like he was swallowing something sour and he lifted his chin challengingly, pointedly touching the faint bruise on his jaw. "Like you're one to talk Moyashi."

"It's Allen, and that completely proves my point. We're perfectly safe with each other. I know that you're such a total prick that I'd never fall for you!" he laughed.

"Tch, like I'd fall for a stupid little bean sprout like you!" Kanda retorted.

"So, do we have a deal?" Allen said, traces of the laughter lingering on his face and wiping away the last traces of fatigue that were still there.

Kanda knew there were probably one hundred reasons to say no. Forming a relationship in the middle of war was never a smart thing to do- it made you weak. But Allen wasn't proposing a relationship, was he? Just no-strings sex whenever one or both of them needed to let off some steam. What could go wrong?

"Don't forget, I know where you live, I could always come and hunt you down anyway" Allen winked.

"That's surprising, I thought you didn't even know where _you_ lived."

"Is that a yes?"

"Tch, whatever."


	3. Mission Administrations

**Whee! More meaningless, mindless sex! I should just label this story as 'porn with a (very) loose plot' and have done with it.**

**What does it mean when you're watching Sweeny Todd, and get a sudden craving for a pie?**

**Three: Mission Administrations**

"You know, I think Komui's finally lost it. There's absolutely nothing here!"

"Tch. Always knew that sister-complex was useless- this just proves it."

Allen pulled out the mission folder and flicked through it. "Well, we're in the right place, but where's the finder?"

"This had better not be another team building mission" Kanda grouched, giving Allen an evil look. "I don't _need_ to work on my team skills!"

"Of course not" agreed Allen with a smothered grin. Kanda scowled at him suspiciously, but the look was returned with an inscrutable innocent expression.

"Hmph, baka Moyashi."

"Allen, and stop calling me an idiot, idiot."

"Tch."

"Jerk"

Kanda replied with something undoubtedly rude in Japanese that Allen didn't understand but scowled at anyway and wondered if he could hack Kanda into enough pieces that he could blame it on an Akuma.

Not knowing the other exorcist was cheerfully plotting his murder behind him, Kanda set out to explore the town and try and locate their missing finder. "Oi, Moyashi."

"It's Allen" said Allen tiredly. "What?"

"I found the finder" and he stirred the dust and beige robes with a booted toe. "Akuma got here first."

"Shit" Allen cursed whole-heartedly, looking around. "Well, I can't see any at the moment." He bent to retrieve the finder's pack. "Let's look around just in case."

Kanda grunted in agreement and they both set off through the abandoned streets.

"They killed everybody" Allen said aghast.

"Not too long ago either. This morning, maybe last night."

Allen looked at Kanda suspiciously, wondering why he was actually _talking_ to him, never mind _civilly. _"How do you know that?" he asked curiously, sweeping his gaze over the gruesome ashy remains.

Kanda gave him a look that suggested that he thought Allen was an incredible imbecile. "_Because_ Moyashi, it rained yesterday afternoon. The soil's still damp but the ash hasn't washed away, therefore the attack came later."

"Oh" Allen said, feeling incredibly imbecilic and about two inches tall, something that only Kanda ever seemed to be able to make him feel. "Well since they aren't here anymore the innocence is probably long gone, but we better double check."

"Tch. Idiot."

"I resent that."

0o0o0o0o0

"Well, there's officially nothing here. What a waste of time. Travel for four days with the world's most exciting conversationalist" and here Allen smirked pointedly at Kanda, who tightened his hold on Mugen as though restraining himself fro drawing it and chopping Allen into fun-sized pieces. "And once we get here" Allen continued as though Kanda wasn't about to kill him, "we find there's not a living person for miles, and more importantly _no food!_"

"Are you always this annoying? No wait, don't answer that. Yes, yes you are. Are you ever going to shut up?"

"But I'm hungry!" Allen whined pathetically, knowing Kanda was going to snap soon and loving every minute of it. That tic under Kanda's left eye was funny to watch, though the pulsing vein on his forehead was pretty repulsive.

"And there's plenty of food!" Kanda growled, gesturing at the now ownerless houses.

"But…"

"_They_ aren't going to need it, are they?"

"Well…" Allen paused, posture immediately shifting from passive to offensive. Kanda noticed straight away. "How many?"

"Only six or seven. Probably came back to finish off anybody they missed the first go round" Allen said over the faint whirring of his cursed eye. "Not a completely wasted trip then eh?"

0o0o0o0o0

"And you call _me _the idiot!" Allen huffed as he dragged Kanda's slumped form into one of the abandoned houses and dumped him onto the sofa.

"I'm not the only one who got hit" Kanda grated out from between clenched teeth.

"But you _are_ the only one who's bleeding" the white haired exorcist snapped as he dug through the finder's pack. "Take off your coat."

"Don't bother; it'll be healed by morning."

"Take off your coat, you're getting blood everywhere."

"Forget it."

Allen turned on him, innocence activated and one long razor sharp finger levelled at Kanda's face. "Take it off, or I'll do it for you."

Kanda just scowled at him and crossed his arms stubbornly.

"Fine" Allen said "bleed to death for all I care!" and he threw the roll of bandages at Kanda, hitting him on the forehead before storming from the room.

Kanda listened to him banging around in the kitchen, probably making something to fill his bottomless stomach, before he sighed and tugged off his coat. Though it was true that the wound would be gone by tomorrow, spending the night covered in blood did not sound appealing. Dammit, he wouldn't be able to clean it himself. He tried looking over his shoulder at the slashing cut, but all he could see was the bright splash of blood. He sighed again. Fuck. He should have just accepted the help earlier. Now he was going to have to _ask_ for it. The smell of something cooking came floating through the open doorway and despite himself his stomach rumbled.

As Kanda sat slowly oozing blood onto the couch, Allen was throwing the last ingredients into the soup he'd quickly knocked together. He left the pot simmering on the stove as he wiped his hands and walked back towards the living room, leaning on the doorframe and watching Kanda scowl over his shoulder at his injured back.

"Going to let me help now?"

"Tch" Kanda looked away.

"Good" Allen smiled and retrieved a bowl of warm water and a cloth from the kitchen and carried it to the sofa. "Lie on your front" he commanded, waiting while Kanda obeyed, albeit rather unhappily. Allen carefully wiped the blood away, running his hands over the cleansed skin to check for any other injuries and swelling. Kanda shifted a little under his touch and made a small sound. "Sorry" said Allen pulling his hand away, afraid he'd hurt him. "Well it's not as bad as it looks. The bleeding's almost stopped now anyway." He prodded the wound gently with exploratory fingers, leaning over Kanda's back to look closer at his shoulder. "I think it's already started to heal here." He looked down in surprise when Kanda wiggled a bit, half into and half away from the touch.

A rather nefarious grin spread over Allen's face and he leaned closer to confirm his suspicion, his warm breath ghosting over bare skin watching for Kanda's reaction. The older man made a noise that was half smothered by the sofa as he buried his face into the cushions.

Allen had to stifle his own sound- a chuckle of amusement as a plan formed in his mind. He bent low and ran his lips around the clotting wound that began on the back of Kanda's left shoulder. The man tensed below him. "What are you doing Moyashi?"

Allen laughed lightly, placing a soft kiss over the healing wound. "Didn't your Mother ever kiss your wounds better?"

"No, but neither did yours" said Kanda without thinking.

Allen froze above him. "That was low" he whispered, digging a finger into the still sluggishly bleeding wound above Kanda's right hip, causing the man to flinch away before he could stop himself.

"Fuck Moyashi, what was that for?"

Allen ignored him in favour of moving away, a disappointed and hurt look on his face. "Stay where you are and don't put your coat back on, it'll be better of you leave it to dry out since its already healing."

Kanda sat up, confused. For a moment there it had looked like they were heading in a very promising direction. But now Allen's whole attitude had changed. He looked around and realised he was alone again, so got up and followed the younger exorcist into the kitchen where he found him stirring a pot of whatever it was filling the house with that appetising smell. "I told you to stay where you were" Allen said without looking up.

Kanda wondered what he should say. He couldn't say sorry- he _never_ apologised, and he'd never said sorry to Allen for anything he'd said before. Neither of them had- it was just one of those things that came along with their tempestuous relationship. They argued, they insulted, and they got on with it. He also knew he probably had overstepped the mark with that last comment. "Moyashi, I-" He didn't get any further than that before Allen was on him, pushing him against the solid wooden table, grasping his wrists firmly. "Shut up Kanda" he growled threateningly.

Well this was new, and rather exciting. Kanda raised an eyebrow questioningly and attempted to arch into Allen's touch.

"Oh no you don't" Allen snapped and faster than Kanda expected, spun him around, forcing him flat against the table, though he did release his wrists so Kanda could catch himself before his head hit the surface. "Got to watch your back" Allen explained as his hands slid round Kanda's waist and began unfastening his trousers.

Kanda tried to struggle free, not sure he wanted to be on the receiving end, but he couldn't get loose. Anger and frustration had made Allen's grip merciless, yet Kanda felt nothing but the thrill of anticipation as his trousers were dragged down, despite the fact that he was now almost naked bent over a table in a dead man's kitchen.

"What are you doing Moyashi?"

"If you need to ask that question you're more of an idiot than I took you for."

"I don't remember agreeing to this"

Allen reached over to the counter for something, his other hand resting on Kanda's hip a warning for him not to move. "I haven't heard you say stop" he pointed out. Kanda was rather annoyed to have that brought up; he'd prefer Allen not have noticed his reluctance to put a stop to this. And it was only fair Allen had a turn. Right? _Yeah, keep telling yourself that's why you're not fighting to get away._ He barely realised Allen's hand on his side had gone before it was back again and something cool and slick was circling his entrance.

"Today's first lesson: lubrication" Allen said as a slippery wet finger slipped inside, an odd and completely new sensation that wasn't particularly painful, but was still decidedly strange. The smooth digit moved slowly, stretching him to make room for a second. This one definitely went beyond strange and Kanda tried to move away, but the solid edge of the table prevented him from going anywhere. Jesus, if this was what it was like while Allen was being slow and gentle and careful, how had Allen stood what he'd done to him all those nights ago?

"The second lesson: _proper _preparation" Allen whispered, sliding a third finger into the widened passage, scissoring and twisting and reaching and curling and Kanda cried out and bucked against the table as stars burst across his vision and pleasure shot through his body. When he came back to himself he heard Allen laughing faintly behind him, the only warning before the same sensation scored through him, and then once more before the fingers withdrew. Kanda didn't know whether to sigh in relief or whine in complaint, so settled for saying nothing, even when he heard the rasp of a zip and the sound of material sliding across skin.

Something very different to three slim fingers was set against his entrance and Allen's hands took a firm grip of Kanda's hips, pulling him back from the table a little until Allen's right hand could slip between the edge of the table and Kanda's body, stroking him slowly as he pushed inside the older man. He stopped for a moment, waiting for Kanda to relax- he could see how tense he was in the rigid line of his back, before withdrawing almost completely and pushing back in.

Kanda grunted, though Allen wasn't sure whether it was a good sound or not; but since he wasn't being told to stop he picked up the pace, careful not to loose control just yet- he was determined that Kanda would make at least one purely pleasured noise before he let himself go. Not that Kanda didn't seem like he was enjoying himself as he thrust back against Allen's body and forward into his hand with abandon.

Grinning like a loon, Allen changed the angle slightly and thrust harder and deeper, finally gaining a strangled moan from the man bent over beneath him. His hand moved faster and the twin sensations on the Japanese man were apparently too much. Moyashi, I'm…" and didn't get any further as he released over Allen's hand and the floor with a guttural broken groan.

Allen's right hand came back to claim its place on Kana's bare hip, guiding the motions until Allen reached his own completion with a shout.

He wanted nothing more than to collapse onto Kanda's heaving back, but the wound warned him against it, so he withdrew and sat heavily in one of the kitchen chairs, trousers round his knees.

Kanda straightened slowly, bending to pull his trousers up. He noticed the bottle of cooking oil on the counter beside the table and realised that was what Allen had meant by lubrication. "Why were you so careful? You should have been trying to pay me back for the other night."

Allen opened one eye and looked at him in amusement. "It's not nice to rough-fuck a virgin; I had to take it easy on you."

Kanda frowned, suspecting that he was being insulted, but not quite sure what about what Allen had said was insulting.

Allen closed his eye again and tilted his head back. "Trust me" he said lazily, "it's better if your first time doesn't involve the 'spit and shove' method."

Kanda was confused now. Allen wasn't complaining about his treatment though… did that mean Kanda hadn't been his first?

"Ding ding ding, we have a winner" Allen said, standing and pulling his clothes straight.

He wanted to ask questions: Who? When? Where? How? But it wasn't his place to ask questions- it wasn't any of his business who had come before. They weren't in a relationship, and Allen could have fucked the entire Order for all the significance it had in regards to their current arrangement.

Allen pulled out two bowls and dished out the soup after washing his hands in the deep white sink, pushing one across the table to Kanda before sitting down with his own. He raised his spoon in a salute. "Dig in, if you weren't hungry before, you should be now. I know I've worked up an appetite." And he grinned innocently as though he hadn't just banged the man opposite him on the very table they were now sitting at.


	4. Nothing has changed

**Four: "Nothing has changed!"**

After they arrived home and reported to Komui, both exorcists wanted nothing more than to bathe, eat and sleep. Well, actually Allen wanted to eat, bathe, eat, eat some more, sleep, eat and then sleep again. Maybe with more eating involved. And Kanda was quite hungry himself, since all he'd eaten were Allen's attempts at making something edible out of the contents of the cupboards of the deserted homes. Not that Allen couldn't cook, quite the opposite in fact, something he attributed to his time with Cross, but it was far from what the Japanese man was used to and the choice of ingredients had been rather limited. If he saw another potato anytime soon he was going to shove it up someone's nose. Shame Lavi was on a mission with Bookman right now…

They ended up in the dining hall together, and so were naturally in the queue next to one another, and somehow it followed that they should sit at the same table. Of course, it did _not_ mean that they had to talk to one another, but the silence was a companionable one. All around the order, bets were cast as to the meaning of this strange new development.

When Kanda had finished, he did not leave as he usually would have done, instead sitting rigidly on the bench as though he did _want_ to leave, but was held in place by some mystical force. He watched Allen eat, those damn questions praying on his mind and he _hated_ that they were- he wasn't supposed to care what the stupid bean sprout got up to. He was so consumed by his internal dilemma tat he hadn't even realised Allen was no longer eating, but was watching him with an amused look on his face. "You ok in there Kanda?"

Kanda almost, _almost_ jumped in surprise. But he was Kanda, so he did not. He merely looked at Allen as though bored, and not driven crazy by the thoughts of who else in the Order had screwed the sprout, who the hell had even _wanted_ to? Well, he had, obviously. But not because he was attracted to the sprout, for heavens sake. He was just handy. In more ways than one… dear Lord, dirty thoughts, dirty thoughts.

The amused look on Allen's face had increased, as though he knew exactly what was going through the older man's head. "You really want to know that much?"

Kanda scowled. "No" and then realised that he'd acknowledged that he was even thinking about it. "Know what? I'm not interested in your sordid sex life Moyashi" yeah, _that_ was smooth, no way he noticed that.

"Mmm-hmm, sure." Allen gathered his empty dishes together. "Just as well, the list could take a while" he said before standing up and leaving the table without a backward glance.

0o0o0o0o0

Another month passed with both exorcists away on missions, though not together, and for some reason it annoyed both of them. Ironically enough, waiting for their next encounter was causing more stress as the act itself let off. By the time they were both home at the same time, they didn't even manage to make it to one of their rooms, and only managed to avoid anyone from disturbing them in the storeroom they were holed up in by the pure fact that the door couldn't be opened, since Allen had his back pressed against it at the time, with Kanda pressed against _him_. Luckily by the time the scientist who had been trying to get into the room came back with reinforcements, they had escaped, leaving the poor scientist to endure a lot of ribbing from his back up when the door swung open easily.

The two exorcists had laughed about that later in an almost friendly way, which became awkward rather quickly and leading them to both flee in the direction of their respective rooms.

0o0o0o0o0

Another couple of weeks passed and they were on a mission together, but they were attacked by Noah and barely escaped with their lives. As it was they lost the innocence cube. That night Kanda had stormed into their shared room, furious at himself and at Allen for allowing this to happen, which started in a fist fight and ended with Allen pinning him to the wall and fucking him hard enough that he had a noticeable limp the next morning, which Allen considered payback for the two cracked ribs he discovered Kanda had given him when they arrived back at the Order, beaten, bruised and a bit broken. Or at least Allen had, damn Kanda and his abnormal healing powers.

0o0o0o0o0

They weren't sure when it began, but somewhere along the line they started seeing more of each other outside of the bedroom, or storeroom, or broom cupboard, or bathroom or… well, you get the point. At first it was subtle- a couple of mornings a week found them both in the training room at the same time, which lead to spars and mock battles that usually ended up with them seeking out somewhere more private to continue.

Then it progressed to meeting up at mealtimes, sharing a table and engaging in light banter and gentle insults over their food, eyes sometimes lingering longer than they should before quickly looking away as though it had never happened.

On more than one occasion, someone had walked into the common room to find both exorcists quietly reading, saying nothing to each other but obviously content to be in the other man's company. Sometimes they had even been found asleep together, sharing a couch or seated in nearby armchairs.

Of course this made speculation and rumour run riot- sure Kanda was probably safe from everything but a face-doodle from the younger man, but what possessed Allen to think he was safe sleeping in the other man's presence? Kanda had either gone soft (highly unlikely, since the finder that he had overheard suggesting such a thing was still in intensive care) or the two most unlikely exorcists in the entire Order were engaged in a steamy romantic tryst… with each other. More bets were placed and money exchanged, but neither of the two exorcists involved ever knew anything about it.

0o0o0o0o0

"You're an idiot Moyashi! There's nothing you could have done! Just get over it!"

"It's my fault, and if I want to blame myself, baKanda, I will!"

They stood face to face, all but screaming at each other. Allen had just returned from a mission that had been a total failure. The Akuma had been a distraction, and a Noah had swooped in, stolen the innocence and murdered a church full of people cowering in fear of attack before Allen could do anything but look on in horror. It was natural that he blamed himself for the failure of the mission, but Kanda would not allow him to wallow in self pity, and as soon as Allen had returned from the mission he had dragged him outside to give him a piece of his mind and a few good punches to help it go down. Allen hadn't even fought back, and that just annoyed the violent exorcist further, but when Allen just collapsed bonelessly in his arms, he felt the fight leave him and for the first time just held Allen when there was no sex involved. And it felt strangely good.

0o0o0o0o0

"So what's going on with you and the bean sprout?" Lavi asked him as they walked together down the corridor, Kanda being strangely tolerant since the redhead hadn't mentioned his first name yet.

"What are you talking about? There's nothing going on between me and that Moyashi."

"Hmm, are you sure? I've heard some pretty strange rumours lately…"

Kanda smirked when he saw the object of their discussion walking towards them, apparently in a world of his own as he was watching his feet instead of where he was going. As Allen passed Kanda stuck out his foot and sent him sprawling on the floor. "Idiot sprout, watch what you're doing, you clumsy dolt!"

Allen blinked up at Kanda, looking slightly hurt. "Well you watch where you're putting your bloody feet baKanda, it's not my fault you tripped me!"

"If you were paying attention to where you were going, you would have seen my foot and not fallen over it!"

"And if you weren't such a dick, I wouldn't have to keep an eye out for your foot trying to trip me over!"

"What did you call me?" Kanda growled warningly, reaching for Mugen.

Allen flexed his left had, ready to invoke at the slightest provocation. "I called you a dick, but you're right, that's too masculine a term for you!"

Kanda drew his sword and pointed it in Allen's direction, only to have it batted away by his left hand, the sound of steel on steel ringing as the two innocence met.

Lavi, who by now had learned not to get involved, just shook his head and carried on walking. "Guess nothing has changed after all."

No, Allen isn't the Order's bike; he's just saying it to wind up Kanda.


	5. Or maybe it has

**More sex! Yes, I know, I have deep seated issues.**

**Five: "Ok, maybe it has…"**

Six months on and they had both accepted that yes, maybe they no longer hated each other. Kanda's attitude still annoyed Allen no end and Allen just generally got on Kanda's nerves, but they supposed on a good day they might call the other friend.

And the sex was still good.

0o0o0o0o0

Allen pushed Kanda back on the bed, mindful of the broken arm that would be healed by morning but still had to be put in a cast so it would heal straight. He looked down at the shirtless man beneath him with a considering eye. "And you call me reckless? I can't believe you let a building fall on you."

"It's not like I planned it that way" Kanda groused, feeling a little vulnerable now that he couldn't move his arm properly to even hold his weapon. And it was true, he had been a little reckless on that mission, but it didn't matter, no one had lost their life and the innocence had been successfully retrieved. A broken arm was a small price to pay. He kicked his boots off his feet where they still rested on the floor, his knees bent over the edge of the bed still.

"Don't worry" Allen said, smiling gently and leaning down to kiss Kanda's neck, just because he could, since Kanda was hardly in a position to stop him. "I'll be gentle with you, this once."

Kanda couldn't control the blush that started on his nose and then decided, what the hell, he looked good in red, and spread over his cheeks and down his neck as Allen's mouth lazily explored his throat and jaw, trailing slowly along it to his ear, then beyond that to where it joined his skull, licking over the throbbing beat of the pulse there.

His body hummed a little at the feeling- they had never done this before. There were never any sensual explorations of the other's body, no gentle caresses, or soft kisses, only warring mouths and grabbing hands and the frenzied need to just _feel_ and not think about anything other than the rush that came with the release.

That wonderful mouth was wandering slowly down his body, teasing and tasting as it trailed across his chest and down his stomach, licking and kissing and biting and by the time Allen had slid from the bed, taking Kanda's trousers with him and tearing them from his legs like they'd personally offended him and was kneeling on the floor between his spread knees, Kanda thought he was going to explode.

He couldn't even _begin _to describe the feeling of Allen's mouth on his dick, and he wasn't even going to try, since brain functions required for thought had taken a holiday and decided that the ability to form words deserved a break too, so all that fell from Kanda's mouth were panting gasps and small, half smothered noises that might have been a name had he let them escape. God, he wished they'd spent time on foreplay instead of just plunging ahead, he'd never realised what he was missing out on, and if he had his way, Allen's mouth and his cock were definitely going to have another meeting again soon. When Allen's hand came to play as well, fondling his balls and stroking the soft skin behind them, he decided that all brain functions deserved some time off and just flat out _came_, shooting into that torturous mouth with a funny sounding shout and crossed eyes.

While he was trying to coax his mind back into the working mindset after it's little trip away, he vaguely heard the sound of Allen's bedside drawer opening and closing, the sound of clothing being shed and knew, in a detached sort of way, that the lube had been found and Allen was naked and there was still more pleasure to come.

There was the pop of the cap of the bottle opening, but he hardly noticed, since the mouth was back again, caressing his inner thigh with a slick tongue and running along his balls while a cold slick finger slid into his ass.

Allen stood slowly, his finger still buried inside Kanda as he hung over him, encouraging him to slide across the bed so he could kneel on the edge. "You okay?" he asked, sounding a little concerned, and very hoarse.

Kanda wondered how it was possible to _not _be okay after that but he nodded anyway, before testing out his voice. "I'm fine."

Allen smiled happily, as though Kanda's shout roughened voice was the best thing he'd ever heard and dipped to kiss Kanda's chest again, gently, softly… almost lovingly as he entered another digit and continued to finger Kanda, watching each expression flit across the Japanese man's face with each motion as though each was the most perfect work of art. Kanda was amazingly relaxed after his climax and it didn't take long after the third finger was added for Allen to deem Kanda stretched enough to proceed. He slicked his own erection with the lube, wincing a little at the contact on his thus far ignored need, and without wasting any more time, thrust in with one smooth movement.

Kanda arched off the bed with each rocking motion, meeting his hips with a kind of abandon that Allen had only ever dreamed the usually contained man was capable of showing.

The long wait meant that it didn't take long for Allen to reach his climax, releasing deep inside the other man. The sensation of being filled with Allen's release, the warm sticky fluid coating his inner walls made Kanda cry out, and a few strokes with his left hand had him climaxing again as Allen hung over him on shaking arms, looking about ready to collapse.

With his unbroken left arm, Kanda reached up and gathered the other exorcist to him, ignoring the mess he'd made of his chest as he shuffled them both up the bed. He attempted to reach for the forgotten covers, but wasn't able to with Allen lying on his left arm and his right in the cast, but the other man realised his predicament and collected the bedspread, covering them both with it as though it was the normal thing in the world. It wasn't at all; since that first night they'd not actually slept together after sex- it confuses things, made you think things that weren't true, one night could become two, two three and before you knew it everything had become a complicated mess and that just didn't make for good sex.

But as Kanda fell asleep and Allen lay in his arms, watching him, the younger man was struck by how _natural _this seemed. And it shouldn't- they had an agreement, non-complicated, no strings, casual sex, no relationship, no feelings and certainly no emotions.

_But damn,_ he thought as he closed his eyes and snuggled closer, enjoying how he was just short enough to tuck completely against the other man, _I could get used to this_. He ignored how wrong this was, how against everything they'd agreed on when they started this arrangement, and could only think of one thing as he too fell asleep-he'd broken his word and gone done the one thing he'd promised himself and Kanda he would never do, and fallen for his fuck-buddy.


	6. It wasn't supposed to be like this!

**Six: "It wasn't supposed to be like this!"**

Allen wasn't sure if he was happy or not that when he opened his eyes, Kanda was gone. Perhaps the other man had been embarrassed at the way they had woken, probably still curled within the other's embrace and done a runner, or maybe he hadn't thought about it at all, merely woken early as usual and blamed their sleep over on the fact that neither of them had felt like moving after last night's activities.

Allen decided he should be glad Kanda was absent from his room when he awoke, since he wasn't sure he would be able to face the man straight away without doing something stupid after his mini-epiphany.

He swung himself out of bed, throwing a shirt over his bare chest but not fastening it as he grabbed his trousers and pulled them on with jerky movements. Dammit, this was ridiculous! He obviously wasn't in his right mind last night, still riding the post coital high after watching Kanda experience what must have been the man's best orgasm ever. And he would know, after all, he'd delivered a lot of the comparisons. He couldn't have fallen for Kanda. He was… Kanda, for God's sake! Who was insane enough to develop feelings for that anti-social, homicidal lunatic. _Youuuuu_, his mind taunted playfully and he briefly considered hitting himself on the head, thus proving his insanity and the whole theory anyway. He couldn't win, obviously. The world was out to get him.

A thought struck him. What would Kanda do if he knew? God, he could _never, EVER_ find out. If he did, he might call off the arrangement, and Allen knew he'd rather live with unrequited love than without Kanda all together. So it was time to stop messing around. Time to go back to the original deal. Obviously they'd become too close- the arrangement had never included training together, or eating together, or reading together. His heart panged a little at the thought of loosing Kanda as a friend, surprisingly he'd become almost as close to him as with Lavi, but that wasn't what they had signed up for. Fucking, not friendship. And that's the way it had to be.

0o0o0o0o0

Kanda lazed in the bath, feeling unbelievably relaxed. He guessed it had something to do with what had happened the night before, since when he woke up this morning he'd felt amazing, and almost hadn't got out of bed when his internal alarm woke him at 4am as usual.

Only when he realised he was basically entwined with his bed partner did he rethink that idea. His legs were tangled with Allen's, left arm beneath that snowy head and right arm in its cast slung possessively over the pale waist, bodies pressed so close together it was hard to tell where one began and the other ended. He had wondered at the closeness, the intimacy for a moment. He had seen Allen as naked as the day he'd been born, traced every line with his eyes, but for all their contact, he'd never fully touched, and never before had they slept like _this_. The first night they had shared a bed, he'd not slept at all, keeping himself awake and stiff beside the other man, who had had his back turned to him.

This, this felt like so much more… and was definitely more than the 'I'm too tired from sex to move' that he was trying to blame it on. It felt natural, as if he'd been doing it every day since birth and would be doing it till the day he died. It was time to get out of here before he started having more strange thoughts.

And with that, he'd untangled himself from around and beneath the other man and beat a hasty retreat.

0o0o0o0o0

Allen poked his head inside the dining hall and was relieved to see that Kanda wasn't in there, though he didn't know whether he was too late or too early to see him, and he wasn't going to start asking if anyone had seen the other man- that was just asking for trouble.

He ordered his breakfast and ate it double time, and was long gone before Kanda was even out of the baths.

0o0o0o0o0

For two weeks he made himself scarce, never lingering in one place too long in case Kanda heard word of where he was loitering, and made sure he couldn't be found in any of his usual haunts, taking to hiding out in Lenalee's room during the day, which is the last place anyone would hunt for any male in the Order, since it was assumed no one was so suicidal as to risk Komui's ire.

Kanda was getting annoyed. He hadn't been able to find the damn Moyashi anywhere, and worst of all, he didn't even know why he cared so damn much anyway.

It was after three days that he realised he actually missed the little brat. Missed spending time with him, missed their training sessions, meeting over a meal, sitting in silence with a book in front of the common room fire… missed spending time with his friend. _Tch_ he thought with a frown _I can't believe I miss the little pest. What a joke!_ The question was, _why_ did he miss the little pest? Maybe it was because he hadn't had sex in a fortnight. That had to be it. His mind pointed and laughed at his foolish attempts at denial.

_Fuck_ he cursed inwardly, coming to an unfortunate conclusion after much thought. _I've actually gone and developed… Urgh_ and here he mentally shuddered _feelings for the stupid Moyashi._

The next question was, then, what to do about it?

0o0o0o0o0

"Lenalee, I need your help, please! I'm desperate!"

The Chinese girl looked at him. "I couldn't tell" she said.

He was on his knees before her, looking up with pleading puppy dog eyes.

"Has this got something to do with why you keep hiding in my room?" she asked

"Kind of, can I come in, please?"

She rolled her eyes and stepped aside. "You don't usually ask, this must be bad." She told him to sit down and calm down. "Tell me what's wrong and I'll try to help"

He sighed, casting around for a place to begin, and realised there wasn't going to be an easy way to say this. Oh well, time to bite the bullet. "I had sex with Kanda."

She blinked at him. "You had sex with Kanda."

"Yes."

"Oh."

"It sounds stupid saying it like that. I should have said: I've had sex with Kanda, a lot. Like more than once. A lot more than once. Like several times. Often. Hell, frequently. Weekly. A lot more than weekly sometimes…"

"You had sex with Kanda."

"I think that's been established Lenalee."

"Well, it's just, I mean, I… well, I knew you weren't exactly ruler material but…"

"Excuse me? How did…"

"Lavi told me about the two of you and your little experiment…"

Allen turned bright red. "I can't believe he told you about that!" he whined while she grinned, apparently not embarrassed at all by the subject matter.

"Still, Kanda…" she pulled a thoughtful face before grinning wider. "So… who-"

"Finish that question and I'm leaving. Some things are sacred."

"So it's Kanda then" she said smugly, but he didn't fall for the trick, just glared at her in reply. "Are you two going out?"

"No, that's the thing. It was just casual. It wasn't supposed to mean anything!"

"And now?"

"It wasn't supposed to be like this!" Allen said, looking slightly deranged as his wide eyes urged her to understand. "I've broken all the rules of the game."

She cocked her head to one side. "What rules?"

"When we started, we promised that feelings wouldn't get involved. We hated each other back then, it was easy…"

"And now?" she asked again, though she knew where this little rollercoaster of angst was headed.

"I've fallen for him Lenalee. I've fallen in love with Kanda."

And Lenalee, close friend and understanding confidant that she was, pointed at him, and laughed in his face.


	7. Tired of me already?

**Seven: "Tired of me already?"**

"So what are you going to do?" Lenalee asked when she'd finally calmed down.

Allen didn't reply since he was currently trying to suffocate himself with a pillow. She yanked it off his face before he turned blue and stared down at him, waiting for an answer.

"I don't know!" he snapped when he realised he wasn't dead and therefore still had to give an answer. "I wouldn't have come here if I did!" She gave him a pitying look and he groaned in disbelief. "You think I'm being stupid don't you?"

She pressed her lips together as though trying to censor he next words, but in the end all she could do was nod. "Yeah" she said slowly, "I do."

"What do I do now?"

That made Lenalee pause; clasping the pillow she had just stopped Allen from killing himself with to her chest as she thought. _How to tell him what to do without him realising that's what I'm doing…_ to be honest life at the Order was getting pretty boring lately, she had to do _something _to stir things up a little. "What do you want to do?"

It was his turn to stop and think. _What do I want?_ Well he wanted Kanda, obviously, for whatever strange reason he'd allowed himself to fall for the most un-fall-for-able person in the Order. But acknowledging that didn't help him out if his current predicament and he scowled, his face twisting in thought. So… what did he want from Kanda? Well, more mind-blowing sex would be nice… his mind started to wander and it was only when Lenalee cleared her throat and giggled did he realise what he was doing. He crossed his legs and shifted uncomfortably, all too aware of where his wandering thoughts had ended up.

"Well, it's clear what you want" she said, still giggling, "or at least what your body wants."

"Lenalee!" he protested, not able to believe she'd actually said that to him, and blushed brightly.

"What? It's true, it's written all over your face" she grinned wickedly. "Among other things."

Doomed, he was doomed. Yes it was true, but over the last few months Kanda had gone from just being a dick and an asshole to being the person attached to said body parts too. He actually enjoyed being around him, having him as a friend. _ Dammit_ he thought, face twisting again _I can't carry on like this_.

Allen looked like he was thinking himself into knots, so she leaned forward and patted his knee in a comforting gesture. "Just ask yourself what you want more."

He sighed and shook his head. "It's not like that though is it? It's not that simple. This is _Kanda _we're talking about here. He'll flay me alive if I suggested making this whole thing serious."

"Allen," she said very seriously "you're sleeping with the man and hanging out with him when you're _not_ sleeping with him. You know, spending time together that doesn't involve getting naked. It's not much of astretch to say that you're already in a relationship."

Allen frowned at her. "Somehow I don't think Kanda's would see it that way."

"He might surprise you" Lenalee told him, "but if not, what's the worst that could happen?"

"He could kill me" Allen pointed out

"Well that's true…" she said, pursing her lips "but you'll never know 'til you try."

Allen sighed and hung his head, hiding behind his hair as it fell over his face. "Yeah, thanks a bunch Lenalee."

0o0o0o0o0

Kanda was at his wits end. It had been two weeks since he'd seen anything but a fleeting glimpse of the Moyashi and he was getting quite frankly pissed off.

At first he had blamed Allen for whatever was happening but then he started wondering if it wasn't himself causing whatever the problem was. Of course this had all started the day after he'd got back from that mission that ended up with his right arm in a cast, and he wondered whether he'd done something that had scared the other man off. That was an interesting thought, but he shook it away almost immediately. He'd not been the one to do anything strange that night, it was Allen who had broken tradition, using Kanda's broken arm as an excuse. Not that Kanda had been opposed to the change, but still… it definitely wasn't his fault!

Well, now that _that _was sorted out, what to do about the mysterious vanishing Moyashi?

He rounded the corner with a scowl on his face as he considered his options. Basically it came down to laying in wait to ambush the little sprout, either near his room (and he could be waiting forever, knowing how often said sprout got lost) or the dining hall, since the Moyashi's lack of direction didn't seem to apply where his stomach was concerned.

He decided to go with option number two, as the dining hall was the one place that Allen was sure to visit with any regularity. He turned the last corner, intending to go down there right now and wait all day if necessary, but was met with the very person he was seeking, leaving a room near the end of the corridor. Well, speak of the devil and he shall appear.

"Well thanks for that Lenalee, I feel a lot better now I've got that out of my system" Allen was saying, a bright smile in his face.

The Chinese girl came to the doorway, a gentle expression on her face and a pillow clutched against her chest. "No worries. You know you can always come and see me if you're having these problems. Even though you seem to have basically moved in anyway" she laughed.

"Mmm-hmm, thanks again. I better go down to the dining hall, all that moaning's made me hungry."

"See you later then" she said and went back inside her room and Allen turned away down the corridor, not once looking back to where Kanda was standing frozen in disbelief. He actually couldn't think of a blessed thing to say after that, but he was damned of he was going to let it go without some explanation. Nobody dumped Kanda like yesterday's leftovers and got away with it!

He picked up his pace and caught up with Allen before he'd even reached the stairs. "Oi, Moyashi!"

Allen flinched, he'd not expected to run into Kanda so soon, and certainly not before he'd eaten something. Though perhaps it was better this way- he couldn't throw up all over the other man when he tried to say what he wanted. It's Allen, baKanda, or can your tiny brain not remember that?"

Kanda's scowl deepened. "Where the fuck have you been? I've been looking for you all over the place."

_Ahh, what to say, what to say? I've been hiding from you so I wouldn't see your face and start drooling? No, that won't do… ummm… nope, I got nothing..._ "I've been around" he said evasively, stepping back a bit since Kanda seemed intent on crowding his personal space.

_Tell me about it_ Kanda thought. "It seems like you've been avoiding me" he said out loud.

_Congratulations Captain Obvious_ Allen thought, just about resisting the urge to roll his eyes. "Why would I do that?"

"You obviously have a death wish" Kanda replied. "Since you've been ignoring me and shacking up with Lenalee. Both things that'll lead to your untimely death."

Allen gaped at him. "I've been doing _what_ with Lenalee?"

"I just saw you come from her room. Sounded like you've been having fun. Working up an appetite from all the moaning?" Kanda sneered "Is that the only way you can have any sort of a relationship? You sleep around?"

Allen turned bright red with anger. "You shut the fuck up! You have no idea what you're talking about, but even if you did, it has _nothing _to do with_ you!"_

"So that's it then is it? Tired of me already and moved onto the next thing?"

Allen looked like he'd been slapped. _Tired of him? Never… how could he even think that?_

"Thought so" Kanda said, moving to push Allen aside and storm away to somewhere where Komui wouldn't spot him destroying things.

"Now wait a minute!" Allen flung out him arm to stop him, but was rewarded with a punch in the face.

"Keep your hands off me Moyashi. Don't touch me again."


	8. Moving up and movig on

**Eight: Moving up and moving on**

Allen wasn't sure whether he should go after Kanda as he stormed away down the corridor, but in the end dealing with his bleeding nose came first, since he was oozing blood everywhere and looking rather pathetic. And he_ was_ still hungry… getting into a fight on an empty stomach didn't bode well for his success. He cast one last lingering look after Kanda's departing back before turning away and heading in the other direction. He had hardly got three feet from where he'd stopped when Reever came round the corner.

"Allen! Just the person I was looking for! Komui would like to see you in his office ri- what happened to your face?"

"Walked into something big and dense" Allen replied with a roll of his eyes.

"Ah," said the section chief wisely, "Kanda was it? Never mind, you can clean up in the office. I think the supervisor wants to talk to you about a new mission."

"Great" Allen said thickly as the blood started to gather in his mouth.

Reever gave him a sort of sympathetic look and looked like he was going to pat him on the shoulder in a comforting way, but Allen blew a rather gross bloody bubble as he sighed and Reever stepped back rather hurriedly to avoid it as it popped with a rather syrupy gloopy-sounding splat. "Actually, maybe you should clean that up before you get to the office…"

0o0o0o0o0

Kanda had just finished wrecking a table in one of the rarely-frequented corridors when he decided enough was enough for the time being. After all, there was a trail of destruction leading from the corridor near Lenalee's room to his current location, meaning tracking him down wouldn't be difficult for anyone would recognised the signs of one very pissed off Kanda Yuu. Not that anyone who understood what the slashed up furnishings and definite sword marks in the stone would _want_ to seek him out, except one person perhaps… and Kanda wasn't sure what kind of reception he'd give Allen if he _did_ show up, though it would probably involve impaling him one way or another.

So, finally satisfied that he'd done enough damage, for now at least, he sheathed Mugen and headed back to his room. He felt doubly satisfied when he walked down the corridor that he'd met Allen in earlier and saw that the Moyashi had left his own trail behind him- little splashes of blood dotted the floor heading off down another corridor that eventually to the supervisor's office. He wondered whether this meant that Allen had been given a mission, and found that he was both pleased and annoyed that he wouldn't have to look at the little sprout again if that was the case.

Two hours and a lot of meditation later, Kanda was ready to face the rest of the Order again, starting with Jerry since his stomach was informing him that it had been a day since he'd eaten and even he couldn't go that long without getting hungry, so he left his room and headed down to the dining hall, both hoping that he would and praying that he wouldn't run into a certain white haired exorcist while he was down there. Though he knew he'd have to face him sooner or later, probably sooner knowing Allen and his appetite. It wasn't like he could avoid the little shit forever, was it? Kanda Yuu feared no vegetable! So with his thoughts swapping between bean sprouts and soba he strode into the dining hall like he owned it (and if he announced that he did, who would argue?) and walked straight up to the hatch, silently cheering as the people already gathered there hastily cleared a path so he could get straight to the front of the queue.

Once his meal had been collected and a table for one procured (a harsh glare cleared the occupants already seated away rather rapidly), Kanda sat in the relative peace and quiet that came from being an anti-social bastard and was just about to start eating when one of the few people who dared to defy his glares of doom sat beside him. He looked up at the interloper and pulled a face, his ingrained politeness to all females escaping him for a moment as he stared down the wrecker of not-quite-relationships-but-could-be-and-all-together-really-good-sex over his tray. "What?"

"Have you talked to Allen?" Lenalee asked, looking rather excited for some reason.

Kanda scowled. "I spoke to him" he said, returning to his noodles.

"I guess he chickened out then, since you're still so grouchy" she said with a sigh. "If he had told you I guess you'd be a little happier."

Kanda frowned at his chopsticks, trying to figure out what was going on. What could the Moyashi have been trying to tell him that would make him, Kanda, less grouchy? Certainly not the fact that he'd moved onto to very different things. "He didn't have to tell me anything, I saw him leaving your room."

Lenalee grinned. "So you already know how he feels? That's good, because I don't think he'd ever work up the guts to tell you to your face anyway… hang on… if you know then why aren't you… happier?"

Kanda looked up then. Why the hell would he be _happy? _He squinted a little, looking very confused.

"Oh no, you don't feel the same way…" Lenalee lamented. "You… you didn't kill him, did you?"

"No, I didn't kill him, but I should have, manipulative little idiot" Kanda grumbled. _Hang on…_ "Feel the same way about what?"

She looked at him like he was a few rungs off his ladder. "The fact that he likes you of course! I can't believe you, is sex all you care about?"

The last bit was said a bit loud and the area around them went very hushed for a moment. Kanda hoped that people didn't jump to conclusions- the last thing he needed was Komui come charging in with a robot intent on removing the threat to his sister's chastity. "Of course not! Wait… he likes me? Then why was he boffing you?"

"Allen boffing me?" She couldn't help it, and fell off her chair, gasping with laughter. It took quite a while for her to calm down and by now Kanda was so confused he was ready to shove his chopsticks through his ears and into his brain, because it would probably hurt less. She finally sat up, still gasping a little and it took several tries before she was able to speak again. "I rather think that I lack the parts he likes" she said with a manic grin on her face. "Plus the fact that every now and again, he likes to _be_ 'boffed'." And she laughed again like it was the funniest thing in the world. "You… you though me and Allen…" and with that she fell of the bench again with a severe case of hysteria and was no further help whatsoever.

After he'd finally recovered from being traumatised by Lenalee's slight psychosis, (she'd probably been spending too much time around her brother lately) he turned his thoughts to the conversation earlier. Allen had said he wasn't doing anything with Lenalee, in his own obscure way, but Kanda had ignored it, too wrapped up in his own (jumped-to, it had to be said) conclusions to really pay attention to what Allen had been talking about. And if he abided by the rules of their arrangement, what Allen had said was true; it had nothing to do with Kanda. They weren't in a relationship that demanded that they see each other and only each other, no vows had been made or promises exchanged. But… if what Lenalee had said was also true, then Allen had wanted that to change. This was all very confusing and the only way it was going to get sorted out was if he went and beat it out… uhh, no, not beat it out of, that probably wouldn't help… talk, yes, definitely talk about it with Allen. And if that didn't work, well, the beating could be the back up plan.

He pounded on Allen's door loudly, in much the same demanding way that Allen had knocked on Kanda's door all those months ago when this whole fiasco started, but unlike that time, his knocks were not answered. He wondered whether he was being ignored, because really, who else would be knocking on a door like he really wanted to break it in, and he was just about to do that when Reever passed him, carrying a stack of papers and wearing a wearied expression of long-suffering that only came when Komui was slacking off… like always. "Allen's not here, he's been sent on a mission" he informed Kanda helpfully as he walked by.

Kanda offered a grunt which could have passed as a thank you in the dark when you were drunk, and charged away purposefully towards the supervisor's office.

He slammed the door open and startled the napping Komui awake in an instant.

"Where's the Moyashi been sent and when will he be back?"

Komui blinked at him from behind his glasses as he tried to pull himself together, and Kanda was struck by how uneasy the supervisor seemed. In the end, after much staring and apparent deliberation, Komui handed over a folder. "Those are all the details I know. The call came through a couple of days ago and it was finalised today."

Kanda flipped open the folder and for a moment just stared at the photo clipped to the front page, at the familiar face captured in it, before starting to read the details below it. He almost, _almost_ laughed. "This is a joke right?"

Komui shook his head. "No, it's not. I'm only telling you because I know you won't do anything stupid with the knowledge."

Kanda shook his head. Komui was wrong, he was the one person _most_ likely to do something stupid with this knowledge.

"He'll be back, eventually" Komui offered by way of comfort and this time Kanda really did laugh, an odd snort that came out a bit strangled and not in the least humorous.

"If he's not killed first" he said and threw the folder down on the desk, unable to look at the face of the newly commissioned General Walker any more.


	9. Misunderstandings make the world

_Whee! It's finished! And it's the last chapter, so smut ahoy! Thanks to everyone who's commented on this fic. I know it's not the best, and it's apparently not to everyone's tastes (lol) but hey, it's done now. Made my week go faster anyway!_

**Nine: Misunderstandings make the world go round**

Time passed, as it is wont to do, and neither Kanda nor Allen saw each other in the months that followed Allen's promotion. His orders had demanded that he leave Head quarters that very same day so he slunk away without saying goodbye to anybody like a good tool of the Vatican.

Time moves on, and as a general rule, so do people, but Kanda couldn't help but think of a lost opportunity to tie himself to the one person he'd ever let into his life with ropes of soft white hair, and spent time dwelling on what was, and what could have been, when he really should have been thinking of other things.

Allen had little time to dwell on the past as he would have liked. As a general, he was prolific, new innocence and accommodators found almost weekly, but he never kept anyone by his side, didn't allow himself to get close to anybody. Because really, what good did it do you? In the quiet times however, those brief pauses when the busy pace of life around you stilled for the tiniest instant, he would allow his thoughts to drift back to those fleeting stolen moments where Akuma and innocence and the Earl and the war didn't exist, but all too soon the world would start turning again and life moved on. And Allen would curse himself for allowing himself to think of things that might have been. He would give himself a rough shake and remind himself that even if he _had_ managed to say what he had wanted when he met Kanda in that corridor, nothing would have really been different right now- Komui would have still called him to his office, he would still have been handed the black and gold coat he now wore, and he would have still been sent out into the world. But something in him still disagreed. It might not have seemed different, but it would have been.

0o0o0o0o0

Lenalee stood with her hands on her hips and _glared_. Kanda found himself a little uneasy when faced with the expression of the girl standing at his bedside in the infirmary. "What?" he asked eventually, hoping that his voice didn't sound quite as scared as he felt.

"You've done it again! You spent years complaining about how reckless Allen was, and you're doing exactly the same thing!" And to emphasise her point, she smacked the broken leg in its cast. Which hurt. Lots. He tried not to let the grimace show on his face.

"I got the job done" he replied, sounding almost bored while trying to subtly shift away from the crazy woman and her glare of doom.

Lavi rolled his eyes- eye? Did he have an eye under the patch? Anyway… and sighed. "It's hardly worth getting the job done if you end up in traction!"

"Tch" was all Kanda replied and pointedly looked away. That sounded like something Moyashi would have said- that no life was worth wasting for the sake of a mission.

With a sigh and a shake of their heads, the other two exorcists left him to his thoughts, which, finally allowed the freedom to roam freely, found themselves occupied by a short white haired boy.

0o0o0o0o0

More months passed, and, like his former master, Allen never came home once. Though unlike Cross, he actually kept in contact with the Order, so at least they knew he was alive.

No one was more surprised than Allen himself to get a call from the Order telling him there was an exorcist nearby on a mission who had run into difficulty. It would take another team more than a week to get to his location to help out, but Allen could reach him in a day, so he was ordered to go and provide back up.

Allen tried hard not to think about who the exorcist could be- after all many of the exorcists were 'he's' and Kanda was the one 'he' least likely to need back up, so he was rather surprised when he arrived in the small battered desert town a days travel away from where he had been staying to find one Kanda Yuu being cheerfully bashed around by lots (and he meant _lots_) of Akuma. By the time he got there Kanda was a little worse for wear, and so Allen didn't pause to chat, instead proceeding to destroy the Akuma who were trying to kill his would-be boyfriend before turning to deal with the mess that was Kanda, currently sitting dazedly under a tree and watching him with half-closed hazy eyes.

Allen complained about having to carry him all the way back to the hotel room. Kanda said nothing, since he'd passed out.

Finally cleaning away the blood and deeming that Kanda wasn't in danger of dying (unless Allen decided to off him in his sleep), he sat down at the bedside and sighed. It had been nearly a year since they had last seen each other, so he sat and tried to catalogue the differences that the time had had on the other man. There really didn't seem to be much difference between the Kanda now and the one from his memories. His hair was a little longer and a little less cared for, and though he'd complained about having to carry the older man, he knew that he was lighter than he had been before; something confirmed when Allen had stripped him to take a good look at his injuries, among other things. Of course, Kanda's healing meant that there would be no scars to show what he'd put his body through, but the slightly too lean look about him was enough to reveal that he'd been pushing himself too far.

Allen rolled his eyes. Typical Kanda. "You know, you're such an asshole. If you hadn't jumped to conclusions that day, we might never have been in this mess." He sighed. "No, I guess it wouldn't have been so different, but if I felt like there was something to come home to, I wouldn't have stayed away so long." He laughed to himself. "I suppose I can't really blame you for it all though. I might have jumped to the wrong conclusions if I heard you say the things I did… but you could have given me a chance to explain instead of a broken nose." He touched said feature lightly, the change of shape not very noticeable unless you touched it, but there all the same. "I just couldn't carry on like we were… being with you all the time and it not _meaning_ anything… it was killing me. I'm such an idiot…" he slumped forward, his head hitting the mattress at Kanda's side as he huffed in defeat.

"You'll find no arguments from me" a rough voice said as a hand landed on the back of his head, pushing his face further into the bed.

"Kanda!" Allen said, forcing himself upright and staring at the unconscious man in surprise. Only of course he wasn't unconscious anymore. "Are you trying to suffocate me baKanda?" he snapped, though he wasn't really angry, just relieved.

Kanda seemed to sense this and merely raised an eyebrow. "Why would I do that? I wouldn't be able to listen to you make a fool out of yourself if you were dead" he pointed out reasonably.

Allen flushed. "You weren't supposed to be awake" he mumbled embarrassedly, looking at the mattress.

Kanda looked at the wall and wrinkled his nose a bit. "I'm glad I did." He didn't remove his hand from the back of Allen's head, even though the reach was uncomfortable, instead wrapping his fingers in the white hair to stop Allen from moving away like he looked like he wanted to. "I'm sorry I didn't let you explain… no" and he frowned at the wall like it had done him personal harm. "I shouldn't have needed you to explain. It wasn't my business anyway."

Allen looked up at the same time as Kanda's eyes swung from the wall, gazes meeting briefly before darting away again. Allen's mouth moved like a camel chewing spit as he contemplated what to say to that. In the end he shrugged and sighed. "Why did you want an explanation?"

_Right, the deciding moment in your life… what are you going to say? The truth? Some parts of the truth? Lie to him and say that he just didn't want to share his fuck toy with some random tart? _His mind didn't even mind that he'd just insulted Lenalee- he was far enough away the Komui's complex wouldn't be able to pick it up. Probably. _Well, here it goes…_ "I was a little jealous… and hurt when I thought you'd moved on and I didn't warrant an explanation… but the real reason was" he swallowed tightly "I-"

He didn't get any further than that because Allen apparently decided that words were useless things and mouths should be put to better use. It had been nearly a year, but their minds remembered each other's bodies and as their mouths pressed together, neither could hold back the sudden burning rush of _want_ that coursed though them. Allen pulled away panting. "Sorry, I shouldn't have done that… you're still hurt and we-"

"Shut up Moyashi" Kanda ordered before pulling him back down. "If you're really sorry you'd be putting that mouth of yours to better use." Allen's eyebrows disappeared into his hair, which, Kanda noticed in a detached sort of way, was longer now, just passed his shoulders, and a smirk appeared on that almost-but-not-quite adult face.

"Well, I better get on with apologising then" the white-haired demon said, sliding down his body, which for some reason was already naked. Kanda raised an eyebrow as he noticed this and Allen just shrugged. "What? I wanted a look while I was waiting for you to wake up.

"Little pervert" Kanda said, not at all minding as long as Allen made it up with some of that mouth-on-cock action he'd so enjoyed before. He wasn't disappointed as Allen pulled back the covers in a slow and teasing way and then proceeded to try and suck his dick off of his body. Kanda was rather surprised when a small bottle appeared from somewhere in Allen's pockets before the general's shirt was shed, thrown to the floor carelessly, followed by a pair of boots and trousers, all while Allen's mouth was still occupied. Kanda found he was rather impressed by Allen's multi-tasking, but was a little concerned about the appearance of the bottle, not sure if he wanted to be pounded into the mattress while he was still injured. He raised his eyebrows ad decided to draw attention to the bottle, hoping to get a hint as to where the liquid it contained was going to end up. "You're carrying that around with you? You are a little pervert!"

Allen looked up at him and grinned as though he knew exactly what was going through the other man's mind, pulling back and grinning wider when Kanda made a small noise of disappointment as the mouth ceased its movement. "And what did you expect? I needed something to replace you with." And he scooted forward, not taking his eyes from Kanda's as he slicked his fingers and reached behind him, sliding them into himself.

Kanda wasn't sure if his eyes could get any wider without falling out of his head, and unbidden his hands reached up and grasped Allen's thighs where they straddled him, his breath all of a sudden becoming very hard to draw as Allen's face contorted with all sorts of expressions. Allen apparently wasn't concentrating on Kanda as he should have been, because he missed Kanda's own fingers being slicked and jerked in surprise when another finger that wasn't his own slid in alongside the two already buried in his body. He jerked again, his body rocking against Kanda's when the older man _reached_ and _stretched_ and _curled_ that finger and brushed against that place inside that made him see stars and pant and writhe and moan with the need for more. He made a wonderful noise of protest that was replaced by something more guttural as Kanda's hand encouraged his fingers free and were replaced by something else. He groaned as Kanda pushed into him, leaning forwards and gripping the older man's shoulders, being careful of his injuries. He didn't wait for Kanda to finish his slow slide to sink into him, sitting back suddenly with a harsh sound that was part pain but mostly pleasure as he began to move over Kanda without pause.

The other man rocked up to meet each downward thrust, gripping those pale slim hips with bruising force as their movements became more frenzied and uncontrolled. When Allen threw his head back and moaned, low and deep in his throat as he came, Kanda almost stopped to watch, wishing in that instant that he had the photographic memory that Lavi did so he could capture that moment in his mind forever. He managed to keep enough about him to continue to thrust, his movement loosing all rhythm until he too released, deep and hard into his lover with a quiet rich noise that rumbled in his chest.

Mindful of Kanda's injuries, Allen collapsed to the side instead of onto Kanda's chest with a deep sigh as he curled into the other man, burying his face into the crook of his neck and inhaling the smell of sweat and sex. Kanda's arm came and rested over Allen's shoulders, holding him possessively, but neither spoke and soon sleep claimed them both.

They ended up sharing a shower the next morning, blaming it on the lack of hot water sufficient for two separate ones, but that did not explain why the entire time spent in the shower involved a lot of unnecessary touching and kissing, which continued after they had exited the shower and ended up on the bed once more, clad only in towels slung loosely around their waists.

Allen looked up at Kanda from where he lay on the older man's nearly healed chest and sighed. He was cursing himself for his weakness. He'd never actually got to say what he wanted, and hadn't let Kanda finish, afraid of what would come out of the other man's mouth if he let him continue. But now… he needed to know… was this the last time they lay together like this- Kanda's hand trailing loosely up and down his back, his own head pillowed on Kanda's chest? He knew he couldn't carry on if this meant nothing to the other man, but at least, if it had to end, he'd had one last taste of everything that was Kanda before they walked away from each other forever. "What now?"

Kanda looked down at him, a frown on his face. "What do you mean?"

Allen's mouth twitched as though his words ached to be freed and he sighed again. "I know you know how I feel about you. But if it's not what you want, I need to know so I can say goodbye and get over it. I can't carry on like this; I can't… be meaningless to you anymore."

Kanda started to sit up, and Allen flinched as though he'd been hit, and Kanda realised it must have seemed like rejection. This was confirmed when Allen started to slide from the bed, his head hanging and his hair covering his eyes. Kanda swallowed his stoic pride and wrapped his arms around the retreating exorcist, stopping him in his tracks. "You were _never_ meaningless to me, Moyashi." Then he shook his head. "No, that's not right- I think you - I think I really did hate you once… but not for a long time now." He moved his hands to Allen's still down-turned face. "We should never have started this" he sighed and rested his forehead against the younger man's. "It was doomed to fail from the start. But it's too late now." And he forced Allen's face up to look at him.

"What are you saying?" Allen asked, looking rather lost as he tried to follow Kanda's ramblings.

"I broke the terms of our arrangement long ago, when I broke my promise and fell for a stupid little bean sprout like you."

Allen just blinked at him. "You… what?"

Kanda scowled and turned away, his face a little red. "I'm not repeating myself."

Allen smiled and wrapped his own arms around Kanda now to stop him from pulling away. "Love you too."

"Tch."

Allen plucked at the edge of Kanda's towel a moment as a lecherous smirk crossed his face. "You're all healed now, right?"

Kanda rolled his eyes. "Little pervert."

-Fin-

_Well there you go, fic in a week. Don't think I'll do that again for a while, I'm knackered!_

_*fans face* well… there we go… random, pointless smut that wasn't quite PWP, but came pretty close. I think that should tide me over until my little sisters have gone home!_


End file.
